Swim the fish.

So my kids have been begging me for a while to get a pet. I don't know why because all my kids are deathly afraid of anything that has a pulse and fur. For all you people who know Nikki, she is the one who started this crazy phase of screaming and panicking whenever she hears the bark of a dog, no matter how far away it is. But a few months ago she made some great strides and befriended my brother's dog August, who is also a service animal. We told her all about him and how he is special trained to look after my niece's diabetes. This seemed to be a good reason to befriend the dog, and she realized that not all dogs are evil and going to bite you.

What's crazy is a few years ago, my parents had a dog named Buster, and Nikki LOVED him. Like literally LOVED that dog. She was only 2 when he died of cancer, but she would lay on him, ride him, pull his tail, and he would basically sit there and endure her. He was a mix between a Black Lab and a Great Dane, so he was HUGE. But he also had a scooby doo face, and the most gentle disposition. After a while he would just get up and move away from her when she was annoying him.

Flash to today. Nikki is terrified, and that terrified reaction has been passed on to the other kids, unless Nikki isn't there, and then Lukas loves dogs, especially Huskies (I don't know where he got that one from). Mollie still acts like she's scared, but I think she's just playing the part of the scared little girl. She runs and grabs her blanket before running away from the dog, so that she has her comfort item while she snuggles with daddy.

Anyway, back to our pet. Yes, we got one, and it's probably the easiest pet you can get (at least that is what Pet Smart says, and yes, I asked). When we went there, Lukas was looking at Turtles, and Snakes (you're welcome Kara), Guinea pigs, but there weren't any dogs there. He also said he didn't want a cat (which I wasn't going to get him any of the above, we were getting a fish, and that's it). But we got to the pet store and looked over all the stuff, and finally got a salesperson to help us out. She seemed to be very passionate about fish, and especially Betta's because she told us everything we need to know and more... in one breath. Which I kind of like. If you can describe all their wants and needs in one breath, then that's a good pet.

The fish itself was around $5, the tank, about $8, food, $5, gravel $3, leafy thing for it to sleep on $3, little log thing that Lukas insisted we buy, $4.  Not buying a dog. Priceless. As we were checking out, I had no idea that there was a guarantee on the fish. Seriously, if your fish kicks the bucket within 14 days of bringing it home, then you just bring that sucker back and they will get you a new one, AND you get to keep the dead fish! Sounds good. The checkout lady said that was in the event that we wanted to have a funeral or something.  So, don't flush those fish right away.

So we got in the car, and there's London and Lukas in the back seat, and Lukas is holding the fish. He didn't want to name it until we got out of the pet store, and as soon as we got outside, the naming began.

Lukas- "Hmmm, how about Fishy?"

Me-"That's kind of a weird name for a fish."

"yeah, how about Fisher?"

yes let's name him after the murderer of fish shall we.

"Bob? no not Bob, I know how about Swim?"

"Eh, alright, you sure?"

"Yes, Swim is a great name. Dad, what do we do when he dies?"

crap, just barely got his fish and he's already thinking up a contingency plan. I thought I had to do that. I mean, I've watched Full House, I know what you do with a dead fish. That's what that 14 day policy is for right?

"Well, everything dies eventually, what will we do?"

"Get another fish."

Good plan.

"Dad, what will happen when his body and his spirit separate?"

This is getting pretty deep, well, go for the truth.

"That would mean he's dead."

"Ok, does he have a brain?"

and it went on and on.  So we finally make it back home, and the lady at the fish store, in her one breath soliloquy on "How to care for a Betta?" mentioned that all you need to use is Spring water for them. Like bottled water. Or water with no chlorine. They had this lovely bottle at the pet shop titled "Betta Water" that was about a liter, and cost somewhere around $8. Basically just arrowhead with a  picture of a fish on it. Seriously, I should do this if pet people will buy this crap.

We set up the tank, put in the gravel, the log, the plant, and now all we need is water. Water..... hmmm, where can we get water. I usually throw out several half dunken water bottles every day, and about ten ever time I clean out the cars. So I task Lukas with finding the above mentioned water bottles. Within 30 seconds he's located the fist, then I find the second, then a big find, Kara's water bottle from he gym last night. This filled up the tank about 1 inch above the gravel line. WE NEED WATER! We're off looking again, and Lukas points to the squirt bottle we use to spray down the kids hair. It's got about a liter in it. Close enough. (this whole time, that 14 day policy is running through my mind). By now we have the fish tank half full of water. In goes the fish. I now have a happy little boy, with a fish named swim, and I still don't have a dog. Life is good.